i must go down to the seas again

home. Beloved and i were talking about home last night, sitting on the deck outside our room here in kona. where is it, what does it mean and how do you know when you're there?

for at least a part of me, the sound of the ocean, the smell of the salt air and the screech of the sea birds is home. i grew up hearing its intermittent roar - on saturday mornings when my father would take us down to the beach to walk, in the evenings, when my grandmother took us to the rides, in the afternoons when my mother hauled us faithfully down to the beach to play.

i loved to sit and watch the waves...long after i outgrew the need to jump them, i've never tired of sitting on the sand and watching the waves roll in. so here i am, perched on the edge of an island in the middle of the biggest ocean in the world...watching the waves, and feeling like i'm home.

and furthermore, the war will end. blessed be.

it is the dawning...

of the sun in aquarius. even though the outside world is frozen still and white, the light is brighter than it was, more golden and intense. in the trees, i hear a bird calling, the first i've heard in months that's not the harsh cawing of the crows.

things have been happening here, too. the Angel book is under consideration; i'm tweaking a manuscript to send to a new agent. a casual writing acquaintance bubbled up out of the blue with an opportunity that offers a way for me to utilize my skills in a way that will help others and myself.

im finding the more questions i ask, the more answers i get.

and furthermore, the war will end. blessed be.

happy new year

...and the lights went dark.

i'll be honest, Gentle Readers...my life's turned upside down and inside out in ways i was completely not expecting. or maybe i WAS expecting it...and was just hoping against hope nothing was ever going to happen.

sort of the way most of us think about dying.

suffice it to say that in the last month since i posted, things have changed with a capital C, and whether these changes are good changes or bad changes or permanent changes or temporary, i have absolutely no idea.

all i know is that the winds of change are blowing fierce and hard. it gets scary at times, especially when i try to peer into the darkness i see llooming all around me. my last post seems eerily prophectic and hopelessly naive. and yet... and yet i DO hear the new song ringing.

what it is, and what it will ultimately sound like...it's still too soon to say.

and furthermore, the war will end. blessed be.