the sun also rises

i had an interesting discussion with Beloved this morning. he's reading an "auto"biography of eric clapton, and i've happened to read a bit of it myself. i put auto in quotes because its pretty clear that a hapless ghost wrote it. what's even more clear is that while mr. clapton may be in Beloved's estimation a "guitar god" as a human being he's been mostly pretty worthless.

maybe im being harsh. its not that i don't expect my icons to have feet of clay. (on the other hand, i don't have many human icons.) but i do look for a certain empathy, a certain awareness that tells me the icon in question understands that she or he is not alone in the universe, that the icon exhibit kindness and consideration for people like women and small children before i'm impressed. talent alone is not sufficient.

it occured to me that's why i don't like hemingway, even though i certainly acknowledge the debt i owe his writing style. i don't like the sensibility of hemingway the man that leaks through his stories. the characters are unpleasant, unhappy and unkind. i know more than enough people like that - the last thing i want to do is read about them.

tonight, the cosi-girls book club meets to discuss my first novel. it's been an interesting exercise to re-read it. i wonder if they will realize how much of me leaks through.

and furthermore, the war must end. blessed be.