the last day of winter found me flying through sluicing rain down to easton, pennsylvania, and a child support hearing. for the upteenth time in the last 12 years, my ex is once again claiming he's making less money than ever before.
even the judge noted the frequency with which ray has approached His Honorable Court. he peered over his bi-focals and said: i see you've been making this argument for quite a few years. then he let ray and his lawyer go on and on.
was it worth the trip, asked Beloved, to whom the machinations of the Halls of Justice mean as much as the stock market means to most people.
there is nothing fair about the legal system, nothing just. the cost of extracting what we call justice is scarcely worth the effort, it seems to me, when all is said and done. there is a piece of me that would so rather not engage with it or my ex on any level.
but there is also a piece of me that knows that this is not about me, as much as ray would like to make it. this is about libby. if i don't assert her interests, who will? if i don't speak up on her behalf, who does? and why should she believe her father was not much more than a sperm donor, unless she sees it for herself?
and furthermore, the war must end. blessed be.