Monday, January 26, 2009

eating the angel way - part three

but it wasn't just a question of what i was supposed to eat, however. the more i sat and thought about and considered this issue, the more i realized how adversarial my relationship with food and my own body really was.

for example, i frequently forget to eat. i can go hours and hours and hours - all day - practically and forget to eat. part of it is that, for me, the process of creating anything lulls me into an Other Place, a place where mundane things like time and meals and laundry and dust bunnies don't exist. when writing something as long and as complex as my last trilogy, for example, or even the book i'm working on now, the temptation is always to go to that OtherPlace, and stay there. re-entry, as im sure anyone reading this who's an artist of any sort understands, can be tricky.

i realized that what usually happened was that i didn't eat all day - from perhaps six in the morning until about two or so in the afternoon. at that point, of course, i was ravenously hungry, completely exhausted and prone to put anything at all into my mouth, assuming it met the parameters of my picky palate. when i was running and working out, of course, i'd followed a carefully planned diet of meal shakes and salads and yogurts and minimeals. but left to my own devices, mistress of oceans of time, with access to practically any kind of food available on the planet at any given time, i frequently chose not to feed myself at all.

so what was THAT about, i wondered?

and furthermore, the war WILL end. blessed be.

10 comments:

Lynette said...

so i am not alone in this
get busy and not eat
feel guilty and not eat
look at myself and not eat
get pissed and eat too much!

April said...

Like you, I can forget to eat if I'm really busy. Then, when I do grab a bite, I gobble food down like it's my last meal!

Carolyn G said...

I never forget to eat and that's my problem. I am always thinking about it. UGH!

NJDecorator said...

I do that too. But then I just adjust the plan to eat later than usual - still trying not to eat anything after 9:00 pm.

You'll figure this out...

Laura Rose said...

I, too, can forget to eat. Especially if I'm home for a morning. so many things I'd rather do than cook myself a good breakfast. I must admit, I've done this this very morning. so it's time to head away from the cptr and into the kitchen for some quinoa flake cereal!

Martha said...

What is that all about? I am reminded of the expression-
"It's not what you're eating, but what's eating you."

Kathy said...

It's great for you to open this discussion of food. I think sometimes our foodiness is more private and secret than our sex life or our paycheck or our biggest fears (other than a large banana split.) Maybe this will help us all face the food. And whatever it represents. Although, as Freud didn't say, "sometimes a banana split is just a banana split."

Mama Krit said...

I know how that goes. Once I start to sew, it can be hours later before I even realize my stomach as been growling!

Kim said...

I get that way at work. I have to plan and make myself eat.

Bonnie said...

I've been there, done that. I have always had weight issues. Large DNA runs on my dad's side of the family and don't you know I inherited it, lol. I have managed to stay quite a bit smaller than cousins and aunts and uncles, but it's been a struggle. And I'm no Skinny Minnie. Diabetes has me struggling with weight loss now. I just need will power and motivation.